


The Aftermath

by Eighthofhearts



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Aftermath, Angst, Family Angst, Gen, I'll write some fluff to make up for this lol, Regret, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Hatred, Spoilers - Campain 2 Episode 95
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-14
Updated: 2020-02-16
Packaged: 2021-02-28 05:21:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,420
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22719853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Eighthofhearts/pseuds/Eighthofhearts
Summary: What do you for a friend who doesn't tell you the truth? The one who preaches of radical honesty and openness, but remains so closed off himself. What do you do when they're in their greatest hour of need? There's not much you can do but sit and wait.(Spoilers for Campaign 2, Episode 95 of Critical Role)
Comments: 7
Kudos: 94





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> @ Matt and Taliesin; plz be nice to us next week

Caduceus sat on on the edge of the water, unmoving, his face oddly at peace. The Nein stood by, just as frozen as their friend, but out of a fear that none of them understood. None of them had been prepared for what they were about to encounter, but somehow, they all managed to survive. 

While most had been very bloodied and battered by the battle with the bull-like beast, it was Caduceus who they were most worried about. Each member stood stark still where they had finished their fight, all of them turned Caduceus’s way.

He appeared to be meditating, taking a seat near the water about halfway between the two sets of statues that they now knew to be “his people”. While the fight with the beast had been rough, that was the easy part; none of them knew how to deal with this aftermath. 

He had been so closed off, the Nein could tell that this was his family by the resemblance but they didn’t even know their names. Who were the two older women cowered in fear? Was that his mother? With eyes that they all wanted to assume were as kind as his but were too mangled in stone and horror to tell. 

What about the older man and fallen woman? That had to be his father and sister. Was the girl older or younger than their friend? How long had it been since he’d seen her? How long had she been stuck like this? There were just so many questions to be asked. 

Trepidatiously, Jester was the first to act. Her body moved slowly, her hand reaching out and guiding her way. “Caduceus...” she gradually sounded out each syllable of his name, her voice almost a whisper, concerned about how he would respond. As she inched forward, there was no response from the quiet firbolg. A hand, however, pulled her back, Beau stopping Jester before she could get too close. The other woman shook her head, silently advising to leave him be. 

“But,” Jester barely managed to squeak out, her sad eyes beginning to glisten, “we have to help him.” 

Still holding Jester by the wrist, Beau looked up, baffled by how still and calm Caduceus looked, surrounded by this macabre statue garden of his loved ones. “I don’t think there’s much we can do for him right now,” Beau responded flatly, still staring ahead at her friend, her eyes glassy and distant. She turned her attention back to Jester, her eyes now refocused, “Why don’t we go off to the side and get everyone fixed up?”

“But Caduceus needs help too!” Tears were now freely falling down Jester’s cheeks, “His family needs help!”

Beau pulled Jester close to her chest, letting the other woman get out her frustrations. “I know,” Beau responded in a whisper, “But we need to give him some time.”

Slowly, one by one, the rest of the Nein began to unfreeze from their spots, all of them having had their own worried contemplations about their firbolg friend. Moving away from the fray, they all took a breath, thankful for the end of the battle, but unsure about their next step. As they sat under the shade of the nearby trees, they all tended to the physical wounds that they knew were much easier to heal. 

“I’m sure he has some sort of plan,” Beau spoke up after a few minutes’ silence, seeing Jester’s still sorrowful pout. 

“You think so?” Jester sniffled, her body hunched in both physical and mental exhaustion. 

“He knows himself better than we do,” Beau responded, feeling the bitterness of those words on her tongue. They had known him for over half a year now and still knew very little about him. Was this neglect or intentional on his part? Beau now looked towards him with a new type of sadness, tinged with some regret. “He knows his family better than we do,” she corrected herself, “and I’m sure his goddess can help him.”

“I hope so,” Jester muttered, falling heavily into Beau’s side. 

“I hope so, too.” 

As the Nein sat recuperating, Caduceus remained unmoved from his spot, only his flowy clothing and hair gently blowing in the soft wind. For those who had no context, it would seem like he was at peace, but how could that be possible with what surrounded him? 

Beginning to feel antsy after taking a moment’s breath, Fjord eventually stood and silently walked Caduceus’s way. No one tried to speak up or stop him, the group just watched as the half-orc stepped off. 

He approached Caduceus cautiously, almost as if he was afraid to disturb him, but he didn’t think anything but Caduceus himself could break the state that he was currently in. He knew trying to rouse him would not be smart; it either would not work or make things worse.

Instead, Fjord decided to be proactive in a way he was still learning to get used to. He took a seat beside Caduceus, folding his legs, emulating the still and calm his friend seemed to be projecting. He couldn’t tell what was going on in the firbolg’s head, but he knew what was best for him to do. Silently, he sat and prayed to Her, asking for her guidance in the moment of need for his friend and this most sacred family. Hopefully his prayers would be answered.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally I wanted the first chapter to be from Clay's perspective, but he's been so closed off that I barely had anything to base his thoughts on. So, here's some speculation and sadness! I'm ready to cry watching episode 96!

And there they were, just like She had promised. Promise was a strong word, but the feeling that Caduceus had gotten when he had communed with his goddess was one of fair certainty, he knew at least some of his family would be waiting at the Menagerie. She did not break that promise.

Unmoving, frozen, trapped in a prison of stone, the four petrified members of the Clay family stood near the edge of the water, it almost made it look peaceful. There was no peace to be found on any of their faces; fear and anguish, yes, but no peace.

The fight with the beast that caused their state was over before any of them knew it, it somehow felt too easy, but it was over and now they could all move on to the next important step. Except, no one acted, no one made a move towards the petrified Clays, except for the one son that still remained.

The moment the beast was slayed, Caduceus made his slow descent towards his people; his parents, his aunt, his sister, they were all there, but not really. This wasn’t them, so devoid of life, frozen forever in a moment like a mosquito encased in amber. The mosquito was not alive in its honey colored tomb, how could this be any different?

He didn’t know what he was doing, one foot was simply moving in front of the other, only stopping upon reaching the water’s edge. Caduceus stood staring across the way, his eyes not focused on anything in particular. His head then dropped as he released the breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding. A single tear fell from his cheek, rippling the still, crystal clear water below. 

Caduceus stared at the reflection of a man he did not recognize, a man he was sure his family would not recognize. Who had this man become in the years that they were away? How had he shifted, grown in just these past few months of travel? And in what ways had he remained the little brother that no one gave two shits about? 

Who was he to be here in Her sacred garden? He was no hero, he was just some kid in way over his head. 

Letting out one last resigned sigh, Caduceus let his eyes fall closed, moving slowly to sit upon the ground below. She had provided him with answers in the past, Her guidance was such an integral part of his life, but here he could not ask. This was not a moment for Her to intervene upon, this was a moment he had to face alone.

And so he sat, sitting alone with his thoughts amongst the many sounds of this beautiful forest. Perhaps some guidance would come to him in his stillness. 

He had gotten good at blocking out the world around him in his trances. While his life at the Grove had been lonely for the last few years, it was not without its noise. He could easily let his mind float past all the squeaks, chirps and roars of the forest, but Jester’s cries proved to be more difficult.

A young girl herself, albeit much younger than he, but still young nonetheless. Caduceus saw a lot of similarities between himself and the little blue tiefling. The two were on very different, but very important, journeys set forth by their respective patrons, and while the Traveler had not truly proved his mettle in the conversation earlier that day, Caduceus still respected him. More so, he respected Jester’s devotion to Him.

Her cries were hard to swallow, pleas of wanting to help and feeling useless against an unknown force; it was a feeling he knew all too well. He hated that he was partially responsible for her state, but he had much bigger problems to consider. 

It wasn’t long before he felt a presence beside him, it was hard to mistake the salty musk that still somehow hung around Fjord at all times. His eyes remained closed but it was almost if he could see every movement the half-orc made with his mind’s eye. He respected the gesture. It was not going to help much, but he respected it nonetheless. 

He had to admit, the presence of another of Her follower’s beside him did bring him a certain calm the could not describe, perhaps it was enough to let his mind flow free and uncover the solution to his current plight. 

The pair sat together in silence for some time, a silence that brought them peace, but apprehension to their friends. While they were a ways away, Caduceus could still feel the nervous airs they radiated, every once in a while gathering a few hushed words that carried on the wind. They truly were worried about him.

But it was all talk, none of them were acting on the many plans they seemed to be devising. Talk was going to get them nowhere. 

It was then that Caduceus had a realization. 

Shifting as silently as he could, Caduceus stood and moved to the stone nearest to his right. He stole a glance at Fjord briefly, glad to see the young follower unmoved. Caduceus was both proud of his new found calm, and happy that he would not bear witness to what he was about to do.

He approached the statue, the one that resembled the incorrigible Constance Clay. It had been nearly ten years since he had seen that face, frozen now in fear and yet, still standing in defense of her little sister. Caduceus yearned for the day he could be as strong as her. That day was very far off, nigh impossibly far, as far as he was concerned. 

“I’m sorry I was not here sooner. I’m sorry I was not strong enough to act. My acts today are not of strength, but of desperation. I’m sorry I failed you. My acts are of no equatable value to a cure for my weaknesses, but they are all I can offer.”

With his last private words to the stone, Caduceus placed his forehead against his mother’s and began to mutter, reaching into a small pouch at his side to grab a handful of this useless glittered dust that would hopefully bring her back. 

A throaty sob rung out across the forest, alerting the Nein to action. In quick succession, the sob was followed by other mournful sounds of fear and anguish, echoing across the short distance they covered. Rushing over to the water’s edge, the Nein were astonished to see the sight of the four no longer frozen members of the Clay family. 

The two older women held each other close, their sobs now turned to ones of joy. The older man strained as he tried to help the fallen woman up, Fjord rushing over to help in the effort. 

Smiles broke out across the faces of the group, the family had been freed. Jester, in particular, was elated, bouncing from each of the firbolgs to check them and say her hellos. However, it wasn’t long before she realized something was off.

“Wait, where’s Caduceus?”

“Caduceus...” one of the older firbolg women spoke, her mouth hung slightly agape. There was no mistaking that this was his mother despite her more ruddy fur; he had her eyes, her kind eyes that were now filled with tears. “Is he... is my baby boy here?”

The group looked about, but there was no sign of the young firbolg. 

“Fjord, where the hell did he go?” This time it was Beau who spoke up, her words tinged with an acid laced sadness.

The man shrugged, “He was right beside me a minute ago.”

“I heard him,” the younger firbolg woman interjected, all heads turning to her resounding presence, “I heard him... talking to dad, right before fixing him.”

“What did he say?” All the members of the Nein were wide eyed, curious and worried for their friend.

“He said, he said he was sorry, but I don’t know what for... he looked so sad, and then he was gone.” 

The group fell silent, no longer sharing in the joy of the freed firbolg family. 

“Well,” Jester began hesitantly, almost afraid to break the silence, “we need to go look for him, so he can celebrate with his family!”

A heavy hand rested on the tiefling’s shoulder, Jester had never felt a simple touch as maternal as her own mother’s.

The mother Clay shook her head, mournful and resolute. “If he’s run off, there’s no finding him. I learned that many years ago. Ya just gotta... let him come back on his own terms.”

“But...” Jester’s eyes once again began to mist, sniffling before the first tear even fell. Instinctively, Constance pulled the girl close to her chest, holding her as she cried. She looked out to the woods, beautiful yet so terrifying; it reminded her of her home. She hoped that she still had a home to return to. She prayed that her lost son would one day return home too. All she could do was pray.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Come cry with me about the Clays on tumblr @Lesbeauan
> 
> A third, and final, chapter is in the works! It will have sadness, but also some levity and fluff to lighten it up. Hope y'all have enjoyed the story thus far, and thank you for the kind comments <3

**Author's Note:**

> Come yell about all your Clay family feels to me @Lesbeauan on tumblr


End file.
